I’m in a time of remembering and a time of waiting. Waiting for the text or call that will tell me that another of my friends has passed from this earth. She is a mother of two young children, which makes the sadness that much more intense.

As I wait, expecting the next text to be the one, I remember. I remember our hikes together. I remember her using my phone to take fun pictures while at a retreat.

As I wait, my life goes on. I keep myself busy with work and school. I give myself permission to be pensive, to be quiet, to allow myself to begin the grieving process – even though she is not yet gone, my grieving has begun.