I now see awe
For the last several months I’ve hated it when Facebook sent me reminders of my bald days. I couldn’t look at bald pictures of myself without feeling a sense of loss. I wanted to put that behind me. I didn’t want to see them. I didn’t want the wave of sadness that I felt every time they were presented to me.
Since Commonweal, I now see myself differently. When the picture popped up on my timeline, I saw the beauty in it. I was awe inspired by the strength I had at the time the picture was taken. It was taken the day before my first surgery (along with a series of nude photos that captured my post-chemo pre-surgery body). Never in my mind had I thought that I would one day be sitting in a studio in Berkley California posing nude for a photo shoot.
Now when I see the picture I am awe inspired. I see the strength that I had at that time. I see pure beauty in my eyes. It is a wonderfully liberating transition. There is no sadness in it anymore, rather, there is a smile that I exchange with my self as if greeting a long time friend. It’s nice to see you again 🙂