Tired, excited, having fun, exhausted

By | Wed April 22, 2015

This week I’m at an Educational Technology conference – Emerging Technologies for Online Learning (or #et4online). This was the last academic conference I went to before my breast cancer diagnosis put a halt to all my travel, so it is somewhat fitting that it is the first conference that I travelled to.

Part of the experience is great. I spent all day talking about educational technology stuff. I’m involved in a really fun project where I’m helping to bring my friend Maha from Egypt to some of the informal portions of the conference – helping her get some one-to-one time with various speakers – which is also meaning that I’m getting to meet a lot more cool people (you can see our video hangouts on air here – https://storify.com/rjhogue/et4buddy-with-rjhogue-and-bali-maha).

The thing is, none of them ask me about cancer. None! I found myself wondering if they actually know, and if they don’t know, then I find myself thinking “they must think I have the stupidest bad haircut ever” .. cause I have chemo hair which is frizzy and sticks up – oh how I yearn for chemo curls! It is completely uncontrollable – trust me, I’ve tried.

I know that several of the women do know my story – they have commented on this blog, they have gone out of their way to make me feel welcome and supported (Thanks so much Whitney and Robin – you two are amazing!). I do wonder, however, especially when chatting with men, if they have any clue what my last year has involved. And just how amazing it is that I’m here at all.

I did pretty good for most of today – keeping up with the pace of things – until about 5pm. Then I started to crash. I didn’t sleep as well as I would have liked last night. I’m a bit jet lagged (two hour time change doesn’t help), but more, I think it is just that I don’t yet have the energy that I used to have. My body is still healing. It is still recovering. I cannot spend all day running around at the conference and expect to still have energy for evening social activities. I certainly do not have the energy in me to go out drinking and then still be functioning tomorrow. Nope, a good nights sleep is what I need – but I do feel like I’m missing out on some great social opportunities.

Since I have social activity plans tomorrow night (women in Ed Tech dinner), I’ll attempt to take an hour of down time at some point tomorrow afternoon. Hopefully that will be enough. I also need to spend a little more time sitting and less time standing … that is the plan … that and going to sleep now! Good night!

4 thoughts on “Tired, excited, having fun, exhausted

  1. Matt Crosslin

    Sorry that I haven’t asked – I have been curious, but also had a couple of family members that went through cancer and they hated to talk about it. Its hard to know sometimes if its something that you can bring up or not.

    1. Becky Post author

      Matt, no worries. It is actually an interesting observation – but also nice to not be in cancer land – almost all my California connections are directly related to cancer – so it is so nice to be someplace and talk about Ed Tech!

  2. Roseann

    Reading your blogs have made me feel so much better, thank you! There is someone out there like me. Have fun at the conference.

  3. Pingback: Overwhelmed with a huge sense of denial – Living Pathography

Leave a Reply