This morning I found myself struggling to get moving – then it occurred to me, I’m feeling fatigued. I haven’t felt this type of fatigue since AC chemo. I’m encouraged by the fatigue. During AC chemo, I was able to combat the worst of the fatigue with exercise.

The challenge I have now is exercising with neuropathy. This whole neuropathy experience is nothing like I expected. I didn’t expect neuropathy to come with pain. Now I’m finding that neuropathy is coming with tense muscles. What is happening when I use my numb feet or hands is that my calves and forearms get really tense.

Not being able to drive is really making self-care more difficult. Yes, that is a bit of an excuse, but only a bit. I could always take the VTA (the train) or use Uber (like taxis), or ask someone for a ride (I have been doing that a little more often than I’d like) – but that is a barrier to getting out. There is a loss of freedom that happens when you cannot just get in the car and go someplace. I am hoping that my inability to drive is temporary … and that as the effects of taxol fade, my ability to drive returns. For now, I’ll start with walking – if I can walk without visual cognition issues, then I can consider a short drive (avoiding highways) … hopefully by the end of the week.

The good news is, the fatigue is familiar – it is something that I know I can manage – I have a strategy to deal with it.