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Then and now
I have been diagnosed with breast cancer twice. In 2014, we had just moved to California. We had no support network. It was just my husband and myself. This time, we live in a cohousing community and have support from my neighbours. In 2014, we lived in the South Bay Area near San Jose. This…
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Physically, I’m doing well – Mentally, not so much
I wasn’t sure what to write about anxiety. It is really difficult to explain. For me, it becomes a compulsion to be doing something, which is why I’ve had a hard time taking a rest. I feel like I need to be doing something all the time, otherwise I’ll spiral down. If I can keep…
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From Fatigue to Fear: The Unseen Battles of Post-Treatment Life
With the end of active treatment comes the anxiety and depression that I have been suppressing throughout. The fatigue from radiation has me worried about depression. The nightmares make me concerned about PTSD, and the crying, well, that is the only way I can cope right now. I was reminded of a concept I learned…
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And then there was one
Tomorrow will be my last radiation treatment – yay. So far I’ve managed without too much skin irritation (yay again). The doctor did mention that things could get worse or better over the next couple of weeks, but within a month I should be fully recovered skin wise as well as internally, which affects fatigue.…
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Clearing the brain
Clearing the brain I got some good news today. The results of the CT scan of my head are clear, meaning there is no sign of cancer in my brain. I’m cancer free – actually, I’ve been cancer free since my surgery back in August (August 23rd – I had to look it up). However,…
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Intentional Living
The routine of radiation involves me getting up and walking to the hospital for my appointment. This week, my appointments have been in the morning. It is a 10-15 minute walk which has reminded me how much I enjoy walking in the morning – even when it is snowy – but especially when the sun…
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Radiation is a mental struggle
Radiation treatment, in theory, is easier than chemo. It is easier on your body – in that the physical side effects are skin issues and fatigue. You don’t need to deal with all the other side effects of chemotherapy. However, for chemo I only had to convince myself to go four times. I had four…
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Radiation and Losing Friends
Radiation started this week. So far it has only been two treatments. They go pretty fast. Immediately afterwards I find myself wondering if I’m feeling anything. Can I tell that the invisible beam is attacking part of my body? We did have a bit of a misunderstanding, for which the radiation oncologist felt bad. I…
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Radiation, Recall, and Lymphedema
Today I start radiation treatment. It is a 15-session spread over 4 weeks. The first two sessions are this week, then for the next week and the week after, I go for 5 days. For this week, they are putting us up in a hotel that is a short walking distance to the treatment center.…
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Going maskless
On Friday I went to a meeting – in person – without a mask. I realized that it has been the first time in at least 4 months that I have been in a room with people without both them and me wearing a mask. When I went through cancer the first time, I didn’t…
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All marked up
On Thursday we made our way into Halifax for my radiation marking appointment. When I arrived at check in, there was a distinct lack of information. The person at reception showed me where to change and told me where to wait after I was finished changing – however, she didn’t tell me how I needed…
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Some better news
After much waiting during the day, my oncologist finally called. He said that next time I should go about my day normally, and if I miss his call he will call back – he makes sure he gets everyone who is scheduled for a phone consult. That is good to know. We talked about next…
